Maria Shriver's Marriage To Arnold Schwarzenegger Caused More Problems For Her Than We Knew

Maria Shriver has had an eventful life and nearly all of it has been in the public eye. She is a member of the famous Kennedy family and married movie star and bodybuilder Arnold Schwarzenegger in 1985. Sadly, Shriver felt unnoticed in her marriage as she was overlooked by many in favor of her superstar husband. Even when the two first met, Schwarzenegger commented on her body rather than her intelligence or personality. Feelings of insecurity only got worse when, 25 years into their marriage, it was revealed that Schwarzenegger had secretly cheated on his wife and fathered a child with his housekeeper. Shiver was devastated by the scandal and no one was surprised when she filed for divorce (which took 10 years to finalize). But what many didn't know was that the huge media frenzy from her husband's infidelity and lies destroyed Shriver's self-confidence and sense of self worth.

In her book "I Am Maria," Shriver said (via People) that by the time she turned 55 in 2010, she was "barely able to get out of bed," let alone continue with the busy life she had become accustomed to. She was still grieving her mother who had died the previous year. Then, she wrote: "all hell seemed to break loose. My First Lady job came to an end. My father died. And then came another devastating, life-altering blow: my twenty-five-year-long marriage blew up. It broke my heart, it broke my spirit, it broke what was left of me."

Maria Shriver felt inconsolable following Arnold Schwarzenegger's betrayal. "I was consumed with grief and wracked with confusion, anger, fear, sadness, and anxiety," Shriver recalled in her book "I Am Maria" (via People). "I was unsure now of who I was, where I belonged. Honestly, it was brutal, and I was terrified." It was especially painful for Shriver as throughout her marriage, her jobs inadvertently became dictated by her husband. When the couple separated, Shriver was forced to give up her job as the First Lady of California. And this wasn't the first time she had lost a job because of her husband, as she was forced to resign from her career as a journalist following Schwarzenegger's entry into the race for Governor of California in 2003. 

Even though it felt impossible, Shriver wouldn't let herself succumb to the misery. She began writing poetry to get more in touch with the emotions she had suppressed, and it led to a stunning transformation for Shriver. "I found a woman who had insisted on measuring herself by some impossible standard that guaranteed she'd come up short and feel bad about herself no matter what. I found someone who had spent a lifetime avoiding grief. And I also learned that when that lifetime of dissociated grief and trauma is released, it rushes out like a tsunami." Writing poetry turned out to be a saving grace for Shriver and helped her move on to the next chapter of her life.