Red Flags In Miranda Lambert And Brendan McLoughlin's Relationship

It can be easy to look at celebrities and assume that their lives are perfect. They wear outrageous outfits to big awards shows, travel on private jets, and enjoy exclusive events. As fun as basking in the spotlight might seem, being in the public eye can open your personal life up to a lot of scrutiny, speculation, and judgment — just ask any star whose relationship has been dissected in the tabloids.

American country star Miranda Lambert is no stranger to having details of her love life splashed across magazine covers. Her past relationships with Blake Shelton and Evan Felker were marked by drama, and her marriage to current husband Brendan McLoughlin has been subjected to raging rumors. And, despite the fact that the duo appear happy in photos, many of Lambert's biggest fans wonder if she and McLoughlin are truly meant to be.

Of course, just because Lambert's fans question her marriage does not mean that there's anything wrong. The country singer has done her best to shrug off the haters, even posting some adorable photos of herself and McLoughlin in Italy following a particularly bad episode with the tabloids. That being said, Lambert can't deny that there are some serious red flags in her marriage. From initial compatibility issues to long-term allegations of infidelity, it hasn't always been easy for Lambert and McLoughlin to keep their relationship red-flag-free.

When she was still single, Miranda Lambert did not imagine herself with a guy like Brendan McLoughlin, a former NYPD officer who grew up on Staten Island. According to the country star, a city boy like McLoughlin just wasn't her type. And, while instant attraction is not necessarily a sign of a perfect relationship, Lambert's choice to tell the press just how not into McLoughlin she was in the very beginning all but screams "red flag." In a 2024 conversation with Us Weekly, Lambert was asked whether or not she could have ever pictured herself with an East Coaster like McLoughlin. Rather than just laugh the question off, Lambert replied definitively, "Absolutely not." She then went on to elaborate, "It was the most random thing, but it was meant to be." 

Although this response may sound quippy, it also seems odd for Lambert to refer to her marriage with McLoughlin as "the most random thing." If anything, the question represented an opportunity for the country star to open up about everything that she and her husband have in common. But, instead of focusing on all the values that she and McLoughlin share, the singer highlighted their differences.

Some experts warn that this could predict future problems in a relationship. Writing for Psychology Today, Stephen J. Betchen, D.S.W., explained that concentrating on these small differences could indicate a larger issue. "Partners can use differing interests ... to mask deeper incompatibilities," he stated.

Miranda Lambert did not initially feel that Brendan McLoughlin was her type, but that didn't stop her from falling in love with him — and fast. Lambert first met McLoughlin on November 2, 2018, in New York City. The two got on like a house on fire. By January 2019, they had already tied the knot in a secret wedding. Reflecting on this in an interview with Sirius XM, Lambert admitted that she and McLoughlin rushed things. "We didn't date very long before we got married. And so we sort of got to just really, really, really get to know each other. It was just us two with no distraction, at my farm outside of Nashville. And so I was really thankful for it because it made us really strong," she shared (via Us Weekly).

While this might sound like a romantic celebrity love story, some experts might raise an eyebrow. Longtime therapist Maria Baratta, Ph.D, warns that moving too quickly can actually hinder the development of a healthy romance. As Baratta explained in a piece for Psychology Today, "One common mistake often derails promising relationships — rushing into them too quickly, such as by asking to move in together after only a few weeks. Gradually getting to know one another and letting the connection blossom organically can lead to more successful relationships." Miranda Lambert and Brendan McLoughlin's marriage was anything but gradual, to say the least.

When Miranda Lambert and Brendan McLoughlin first got married, they were clearly head over heels. And yet, they still were able to consider that they one day might split up. The pair seemed to take the possibility of parting ways pretty seriously from the very beginning. After all, they had both faced disappointment in the past. The country star had divorced her first husband, Blake Shelton, years earlier. McLoughlin, too, had gone through his share of breakups. Because of this, Lambert married McLoughlin with the thought of separation already lingering at the back of her mind.

When asked by Us Weekly how she decided to get hitched so quickly, Lambert responded, "I kind of went for it; no risk, no reward." Then, in what seemed to be a reference to her failed marriage with Black Shelton, the performer went on to add, "I just felt like the worst that could happen, I've lived through. If it ends, it ends."

Of course, this is not necessarily the most romantic tone for a fresh relationship. Most couples get hitched with the goal of spending forever together. Although there is nothing wrong with being realistic and trying to manage romantic expectations, Lambert's focus on divorce could be viewed as a bit of a red flag.

Before he met Miranda Lambert, Brendan McLoughlin had a pretty normal life. He worked as a New York City policeman, went to typical bars and restaurants, and never imagined that one day he would be stalked by the paparazzi. However, once McLoughlin married Lambert, all that changed. He uprooted his life, quit his job, and headed to Tennessee. "It's just been a lot because he moved to Nashville. He retired as a police officer, and that's an adjustment. There was just a lot of new at once, and that's hard on anyone," Lambert admitted in a conversation with Us Weekly.

Beyond walking away from his old life, McLoughlin found that he had to get used to the spotlight. Being married to a famous country singer means attending major events like the CMA and VMA awards. It also means that your face shows up in magazines and that photographers will chase you on the streets. For McLoughlin, this was not easy. At one point, things grew so intense for the ex-policeman that he actually found himself enjoying some elements of the pandemic lockdowns. "We were figuring out life. 2020 actually was a blessing in that way because we were stuck at home together and really got to know each other without all the noise," Lambert revealed in the same interview. While McLoughlin may have eventually gotten used to being married to a star, we can't imagine it was a painless process.

Much has been said about the circumstances surrounding Miranda Lambert's divorce with Blake Shelton and the supposedly scandalous way the two country stars got together, but it sounds like Brendan McLoughlin's also had some messy romantic troubles of his own. Rumor has it that McLoughlin was not faithful in his past relationships — and his ex's mother has gone on the record to tell her side of the story.

In an interview with Us Weekly, Carol Bruno alleged that McLoughlin was — at one point — planning a wedding with her daughter, Jackie Bruno. "She was engaged to Brendan and he cheated on her and got another girl pregnant," Bruno told the outlet. Apparently, her daughter was blindsided by McLoughlin's infidelity. "She was thrown for a loop, she had no clue. The girl contacted her. Jackie was in Sweden playing professional soccer, got injured and came home and the girl contacted her. She broke the news to her," the mother added.

As reported by People, a woman named Kaihla Rettinger did indeed give birth to McLoughlin's son in November 2019. The baby was born just three days after McLoughlin met Lambert for the first time. Although we are all for love at first sight, the timing of the ex-policeman's relationship with the country star is kind of suspect. After all, it seems he was in the middle of a huge romantic mess.

After marrying Miranda Lambert, Brendan McLoughlin did not manage to maintain a clear reputation. In June 2024, The Sun acquired footage of the former policeman socializing with a woman at his wife's bar, Miranda Lambert's Casa Rosa in Nashville. In the videos, McLoughlin appeared to be hugging, dancing, and grinding with a woman that was not his wife. At one point, the unknown individual seemed to place her hands on McLoughlin's face. She was also recorded touching his neck more than once. According to one source, McLoughlin spent an entire evening interacting with the individual in question. "It was hours of him acting like this," the anonymous insider told the outlet.

Perhaps, unsurprisingly, Lambert was said to be pretty upset by the dancing videos. One person close to the situation claimed to In Touch that things were tense between the country star and her hubby. According to the unnamed source, Lambert lost some of her trust in McLoughlin. "Miranda's stressed over her marriage and clearly taking it out on her fans. She's constantly worried about what Brendan's up to when her back is turned. So any little thing will trigger her temper," the person shared. Meanwhile, we don't have to do much guessing to wonder what McLoughlin's ex-fiancé's mom would have to say about all this. As Carol Bruno herself once said of Lambert, "She definitely married a cheater. A no good cheater" (via In Touch).

At the end of the day, marriage isn't always smooth sailing. Since their 2019 wedding, Miranda Lambert and Brendan McLoughlin have navigated age differences, blended families, and demanding career paths. The amount of pressure that the pair has faced is far from negligible. Lambert herself has even gone on the record emphasizing just how hard it can be to maintain a happy and healthy relationship.

Speaking to Us Weekly in 2024, Lambert admitted that love has not been enough to keep her romance with McLoughlin alive. "I guess the thing I've learned the most is just that communication is everything. Love doesn't always cut it," she told the outlet. Despite these challenges, Lambert did not show any signs of wanting to give up. "Love is hard some days, but the reward is so worth it," she added. Lambert and McLoughlin's relationship might seem full of red flags, but it doesn't seem like they have plans to part ways in 2024. As for the rest of their future, we will just have to see.