Why RHONY Star Erin Lichy Lets Her Husband Flirt With Other Women

As the old adage goes, you can't have your cake and eat it, too — something "The Real Housewives of New York" star Erin Lichy is learning about her husband, Abraham Lichy. Despite insisting that she and her husband have a strong enough relationship that they can flirt with other people, Erin's actions on the Bravo series suggest she's not as comfortable with this idea as she lets on. 

The "RHONY" wife told Page Six that she and Abraham agree that, in general, flirting is okay. "We feel very secure, he's my best friend, we love each other deeply, but we're also very, very close, so anything that goes on, we're talking about it. It's not like a private thing." Erin said she and Abraham will even joke about their flirty experiences, saying, "He's like, 'I got a lot of eyes tonight,' [and] I'm like, 'Shut up. No, you didn't.'"

While this sounds good in theory, Erin's actions — or, more appropriately, reactions — to certain flirty behavior contradict her laid-back, über-confident take on her marriage. Indeed, Erin might claim to be okay with some extramarital schmoozing, but it's clear she has some caveats, especially when it comes to her "RHONY" castmate Brynn Whitfield.

Despite "Real Housewives of New York" star Erin Lichy's claims that she and her husband, Abraham Lichy, have a mutual agreement to flirt occasionally, the drama between Lichy and her Bravo co-star Brynn Whitfield proved that Lichy draws the line at Abraham flirting with her castmates. In a 2023 episode of "RHONY," the cast celebrated Erin and Abraham's tenth anniversary, but Whitfield's comments to Abraham quickly soured the party's mood. 

Whitfield joked to Abraham that because the couple didn't exchange vows at their first wedding ceremony, Erin and Abraham weren't technically married. She then suggested Abraham find her after he and Erin divorced. "She came in. She started some s***. She said rude things to my husband. She wore sunglasses the whole time. Then she walked out. Sometimes, she doesn't have tact, and it really pisses me off," Erin said in a confessional.

Erin's husband, on the other hand, tried to play off Whitfield's comments as a funny joke. The "RHONY" star was not having it, retorting to her husband, "I don't know why you're laughing. I'm, like, disgusted." Erin said that implying she and her husband would get divorced while celebrating their anniversary was wholly inappropriate, and she wasn't sure if she could stand being in the same room as Whitfield.

Erin Lichy spoke about the party debacle to Us Weekly, saying, "Thinking back on it and the behavior, it's just not something I would ever do. I don't think that ... it was the time or place or the behavior that I find to be quite frankly, normal behavior." But, of course, there is rarely ever one singular moment of tension in the "Real Housewives" franchise, and such was the case for the drama between Erin and Brynn. 

The beef between Lichy and Whitfield started over a cheese platter. Season 14 of "Real Housewives of New York" started with "Cheese Gate," wherein another "RHONY" star, Sai De Silva, allegedly insulted a cheese platter Lichy had provided. Whitfield shared these comments with Lichy, but after De Silva denied having ever said anything sideways about Lichy's food, tensions grew between Lichy and Whitfield. The two remained tense toward one another, subsequently butting heads over dinner plans and other drama within the group. 

So, it's unsurprising that Whitfield's comments would have caused Lichy to bristle the way she did. As Lichy said to Whitfield on a "RHONY" episode, "I don't care if it's a joke to bring up divorce with my husband at my 10-year anniversary party." Even if Erin and Abe have a mutual "flirting is okay" agreement, it's clear that Brynn Whitfield is a notable exception.