The Introvert's Guide To Dating An Extrovert
Most people think of introverts as shy, timid beings who are fearful of crowds and hate socializing, which is not always the case. Introverts typically enjoy time alone to focus on their internal introspections, unlike extroverts, who find comfort in social interactions with others. These opposites coming together could be disastrous or result in a beautiful meeting of the minds. It will ultimately boil down to an introvert's willingness to be open and communicate effectively.
The attraction to an extrovert is not surprising, considering their confidence and enthusiasm usually draw people in. An introvert may find the outgoing nature of their opposite helps make them more comfortable in an extrovert's world and can bring out a refreshing side of themselves. While this burst of vibrancy is a welcome change, introverts may be quickly drained by an extrovert, which is why establishing boundaries, being respectful of one another, and being honest about limits is the only way this union can work.
Introverts must find a healthy balance with their extrovert
It is natural in any relationship to explore your partner's interests, even if you're not particularly fond of them. Rock and roll may not be the dominant genre in your playlist, but if your outgoing lover has been looking forward to a Coldplay concert, why not tag along with them? Even if it means not sticking around for the entire show, attending indicates that effort is being made. There is a good chance that your extrovert will do the same for you on those nights when you only care to watch the latest Hulu docuseries.
An extrovert soul is fed by interactions with others. Therefore, don't be surprised if Wednesdays after work are designated for happy hour with coworkers while Sundays are reserved for brunch with friends. This is what replenishes them, keeping them in a positive space. Not saying an introvert should be present for each outing, especially if they are already feeling burned out. However, joining the fun once a month can draw you closer to your partner by allowing you to meet those closest to them. This offers more insight into the type of energy they enjoy being around. But be sure that your hobbies are being explored as well and on an equal level.
Know your limits and stick to them
Embracing one another's likes is a promising and healthy relationship habit. However, in order to maintain a sense of self, it is essential that introverts not lose themselves by conforming to the wants of their sociable companion. Communicating boundaries is necessary. A live show or sporting event may not be your vibe, but a karaoke night at a local bar may be much more manageable. Perhaps a couples trip sparks anxiety within you, but a couples date night is doable. These are all healthy limitations on how far you can push your solitude-seeking self, but they must be shared sooner than later.
A 2013 survey conducted by the love and relationship site, YourTango, found that 65% of failed marriages were due to failures in communication. This includes the inability to argue effectively and resolve conflict. Some couples refrain from addressing issues altogether, which is not recommended for introvert-extrovert couples.
As with any partnership, it takes effort to bring out the best in an introvert-extrovert relationship. As long as both lovers take the time to grow with one another, a beautiful union is on the horizon.