How To Navigate Dating An Introvert And Make Them Feel More Comfortable In An Extrovert's World
You have probably seen the real differences between introverts, extroverts, and ambiverts in action. When faced with social settings, some of us light up at the chance to meet new people. Meanwhile, some of us think that a large room full of strangers is a nightmare. You can easily tell if you are an introvert or an extrovert by examining how you handle these situations. And if neither category fits, you could be an ambivert: you may find that your social battery needs time to recharge, but once you're out for the night, you're bound to make the most of it.
Nonetheless, it's safe to say that our society is geared toward extroverts. Whether in the workplace or in more casual settings, we often find ourselves face-to-face with others. This is particularly true of the dating scene. If you are an extrovert who has fallen for an introvert, finding common ground when it comes to social situations may be a challenge. But knowing what you should and shouldn't do when dating an introvert will ensure you're having fun while taking care of their needs, too.
Acceptance and compromise are key when dating an introvert
You chose to be with your partner because you love them for who they are (even if they tend to want to spend more time alone). Your partner's idea of a fun Friday night might not always align with yours, but you should be cognizant that you don't ask them to change their personality for your sake. Accepting your partner is the most important thing to do when dating an introvert, according to Verywell Mind. Trying to change your partner is a major red flag in any relationship, including in a match between an extrovert and an introvert. Welcome your partner's preferences and accommodate their needs.
But don't ignore your own desires and personality either. Compromise is another key value in introvert-extrovert relationships. "Introverts and extroverts can create beautifully balanced, whole, and healthy partnerships together," licensed marriage and family therapist Lisa Olivera said (via Bustle). "It takes honoring each other's needs and learning about how you each best function in the world. With the right tips and understanding, blending these two personality traits can lead to wonderful relationships."
Just because your partner doesn't like being in a crowded room with lots of people doesn't mean they don't appreciate a connection. If anything, they may value one-on-one conversation and smaller groups more. Find common ground between the two of you when planning events or date nights.
Can introverts and extroverts have a successful long-term relationship?
The differences between introverts and extroverts can feel stark at times. While acceptance and compromise are the big things to remember if you're an extrovert dating an introvert, you may still wonder if your relationship has been doomed to fail from the start. But with proper communication and self-assurance, your relationship could be a life-long romance, per Cosmopolitan. "It all depends on maturity, self-confidence, and communication," David Simonsen, PhD, and author of "Relationship Reconnected," said.
How you deal with your differences will significantly impact your relationship. "I'm an introvert while my wife is an extrovert," Seth Adam Smith, a relationship writer, said (via HuffPost). "Because of this, the first few years of our marriage were really challenging. I wanted to live in the quiet countryside and spend one-on-one time with her. She, on the other hand, wanted to live in a crowded city and visit with lots and lots of people. In the beginning, our opposing personalities had a negative impact on our relationship."
Luckily, the two sorted out their contrasting preferences — and you and your partner can, as well. Smith found that by thinking of their opposing personalities as the ways each partner gains strength, the two grew closer. Recognize the importance of how your partner re-charges and give them the time, space, and support to do so. Navigating relationships is never simple, but even extroverts and introverts can build lasting love.