How To Break Up With Your Textationship

In the 21st century, the internet has become a tool through which we live our lives. Friends can be made through social media, jobs are worked online, and even relationships are created through apps. Despite outsourcing our need for human connection to algorithms, it can often be beneficial when it comes to meeting people. Not only does online dating show us the missed connections we could have had out in the world, but it offers a veil of protection when you're still getting to know someone. Online dating lets you meet people outside of your surrounding neighborhood

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Staying safe takes precedence over instantly meeting up with someone you don't know. A period of texting before taking the plunge allows you to get to know your potential partner's communication style and wants (and look up their criminal record) before you put yourself at risk. Getting into the flow of texting with someone new can be exciting — until you realize that all they want to do is text.

If you can't seem to move your new connection from the phone to IRL, you've found yourself in a textationship. According to Urban Dictionary, a textationship is a relationship, burgeoning or long term, that occurs primarily through text. While a relationship with this person may have seemed promising, their refusal to move things forward may have driven you to cutting it off completely.

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Be honest about why you're ending things

If you've just been getting to know this person and haven't met up at all, on the scale of relationships, it's probably on the same ranking as a situationship. That being said, you need to employ the same tactics to end your textationship that you would with a situationship. Figure out why exactly you want to cut it off and let them know. Are they refusing to meet up in person? Do they not seem to want genuine commitment? Whatever it is, communicate in a kind, honest, and direct way. Be open and honest about why you want to end things with the person you're dating 

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Once it's over, don't be afraid to block their number. If they resist your desire to end things completely, cutting off their access to you is completely acceptable. Sometimes, exes and former flames reach out to try to draw you back in, knowing that they already messed up in the past. If you don't want to regress to the past, don't engage. 

How to not end up in a textationship

If you've ended a textationship because you're not on the same page romantically, then you know that being upfront when you first start talking to someone is a major thing you should do when online dating. Discovering one's intentions before you really get things moving will prevent you from wasting your time on someone who doesn't want the same things that you do. You can still take the time to learn about them over text, but don't wait too long to make plans for the near future.

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Once you feel safe enough to meet up with someone in person, suggest an activity for the both of you to do. It can be as casual as coffee or something more romantic, like dinner and a movie. If they're genuinely interested in getting to know you, they would reciprocate your desire to meet up in person. A sign that someone isn't interested in you is if they can't make solid plans to meet you  Since life often gets in the way, it shouldn't always be a red flag if they can't make the plans that you set. However, if they're always too busy to see you or don't offer an alternate plan or time for the two of you, chances are, they may not be interested.

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